Monday, December 27, 2010

A Christmas Story (told through pictures)

Have you ever read the book "The Best Christmas Pageant Ever"?
It is a classic in my family and the cover of the copy we own reads "The WORST Christmas Pageant Ever" with the word "WORST" crossed out and the word "best" written over the top of it, to insinuate some sort of basic children's foreshadowing.
Initially you might feel that this post is going to be "The Most Boring Blog Post Ever," as most personal christmas stories are. Everyone likes to talk about their Christmas traditions and adventures, but nobody really cares to hear about anyone else's.
However, I did not have a normal Christmas this year.
So, please open those little minds of yours and mentally cross out the word "boring" so we can both agree that this will be "The Best Blog Post Ever."

This will also not be like that story that turned into the hit country Christmas song "The Christmas Shoes."
That song plays with my emotions more than my freshman boyfriend.
How did they fit that much emotional torment into one song?
Not only is the kid poor, selfless, and has a dying mother, but all this is happening on CHRISTMAS.
Throw in the fact that it is a country song and I'm in mourning until January every time I hear it. (Mostly because I listened to an entire country song.)

So, I've made you a few promises.
1. This post will not be lame and boring.
2. This post will not make you cry like a little baby.
3. If you nominate me as 8th grade president we will have soda pop in all the water fountains.
Thank You. Let us begin.

The night started out like any Christmas should. Getting dressed up. Mom taking pictures by the stockings. Feeling all christmas-spiritey.

It wasn't long before we were watching Jordan break the Christmas pinata for the second year in a row. Truth be told I whacked the heck out of that thing and it was just hanging by a thread by the time Jordan got to it. Also, this is my blog so I can say whatever I want.
Next it was off to Grandma Wade's house. Every year we have the nativity to beat all in-home nativities. In an organized fashion we are all dressed in full costume and given lines to read, songs to sing, and sticks to hit each other with when my grandma isn't looking.

Erin, Lauren and I are the "readers" every year. However, this being the first year that two of the three readers have husbands and life-plans (Hint: I was not one of them), Lauren was off in Texas with her new in-laws.

Because we were desperate we asked Erin's husband Broc to fill in and I must say, he looked quite nice in the red graduation robes traditional to the role of "Nativity Reader" (according to my grandmother.)

Other characters included a chorus of Angels...(I got booted out of this position years ago)

...Shepherds (When Roosevelt said "Speak softly and carry a big stick" he did not factor in the lung capacity of nine little boys with shepherds crooks)...

...and three wise men (AT&T commercial anyone? More bars in more places)...

After all the family festivities it was on to the friend bonfire that we had planned for last week until we got rained out.

You know you're from a small town when a bonfire on Christmas night in your sheepskin collared jacket seems like a fitting way to end your holiday.
Here is the twenty-foot tree we dragged out into the middle of the desert for kindling.

At some point in the night Erin and I got really nervous about the large, gasoline-soaked tree we were lighting up with nobody around for miles to hear us scream, but we didn't let it show.

The boys stacked crates around the tree, duct taped a few bottles of gasoline to the branches, lit a match, and....

...let 'er burn.

There was a point when we realized one of the bottles of gasoline hadn't burst yet.
You'd think this would be a problem.
But it wouldn't be.
Only because you have a friend who can just shoot it with his concealed ankle pistol.
Since there's not any actual crime in St. George, he keeps it around for occasions like this.
Thanks Mitch.
Devin also got out his gun, just to remind us how ultra-conservative we all are.

In the end it was The Best Christmas Ever.
If you wanted you could cross out "best" and write "most flaming"
but I guess that means something a lot different than what I'm trying to say.

I hope everyone else had a Christmas as adventure and family-filled as mine was.

Friday, December 24, 2010


Frosty the Snowman is the creepiest children's song ever.
Imagine if there really was a giant man made out of snow with coal eyes running around your neighborhood screaming "catch me if you can!" at all the little children and threatening to return with his beady little eyes every year for the rest of your life.
Hide yo kidz. That all sounds really sketchy to me.
The good news is, I wouldn't really know about any of that snow business. I woke up this morning to a beautiful 57 degrees and sunny.
Sure I woke up around noon so things had already warmed up a bit, but in my defense I was up until 4 a.m. working on Christmas presents.
I just hope my brother reacts to the present I made him better than this kid does...

This poor kid. As an English major I love getting books for Christmas. (I also loved getting books for Christmas when I wasn't an English major.)

This year I requested Tim O'Brien's "The Things They Carried."

I really hope Santa delivers.

One final thing I have to say before the Christmas festivities begin (we have the MOST fantastic Christmas Eve's at my aunt Diane's house, Pinata and my mother's 12 layer jello included):

Thank you to those who read my blog. I feel silly saying this because I know the list is short and close to home, but I mean it. I think I like the blogging world so much because it allows us to share our life stories. I like that I can sit on my bed at night and pick and choose what information I want to give to the world, and the world can read and then give their stories back to me.

A favorite writer of mine, Ann Beattie explains so well how I feel about blogging:

"Any life will seem interesting if you omit mention of most of it."

And thats exactly what this blog has allowed me to do. I can cut all the boring parts and tell things the way I want. So, thank you for reading it. Especially you mom. (Also, hows that jello coming?)

Alright, I'm done with that boring spiel.

Frohe Weihnachten.

Merry Christmas.

Happy Holidays.

Festivus for the rest of us.


Monday, December 20, 2010


It POURED rain all day today in St. George.

A rare occasion for this desert, where a twenty-minute rainstorm between long stretches of sunshine is not uncommon.

I love desert rain, it is so warm and it brings out the vibrant colors of the area, so I really didn't mind it today, as long as I get some good sunshine in before I have to head back to the grey slushpit of mediocrity they call Provo.

If it wasn't sacrilegious to think that the Provo Tabernacle burnt itself down because it couldn't handle one more awful Provo winter, then.....I would think that.

Which I still might.
But I'd never admit it on my blog.
So Christmas break has already been stellar.
So stellar, in fact, that I just used the word stellar, a word I'm pretty sure you have to have long acrylic nails with zebra-stripe tips on them and frizzy, reddish-curlyish-burnedish hair to merit its use in everyday conversation.
BUT, despite the fact that I have short, uneven nails with chipped, black nailpolish on them
I'm saying it.
Only because it really has been.
(That's right readers, I knew you felt a list coming on)
And here it is...
1. I have yet to wake up before noon.
2. I saw my best pregnant friend and her best un-pregnant husband and listened while they so graciously gave me some serious dating advice/orange juice.
3. Met with the TPC (Trivial Pursuit Club) for a rousing Christmas match that ended in me losing by one wedge largely because I could not name the other two chipmunks (Simon and Theodore).
(Fun fact I learned this time around: All members of the SS were required to have their blood type tatooed into their armpits. How weird would that conversation be?
"Franz is dying! Quick! Check his bloodtype!"
"How do I do that?"
", this is really awkward, but....")
4. Spent a late night at the Denny's on the St. George Boulevard where all the creeps hang out.
And us.
We go to this Denny's intentionally to see all the weirdos there and I sometimes wonder if there are other people who go to this Denny's for that exact same reason and if sometimes when they go WE are the creeps they are looking for.
5. Heard my mother and father sing in our church choir. My mom will be reading this post soon, and shortly thereafter she will call up the stairs to me for the thirteenth time since Sunday and ask, "But Katie, are you SURE the choir sounded alright?" and I will hit the button on the tape recorder I have set up for choir Sundays that will call back to her "Yes mother. Like a chorus of Angels." or "You never sounded better! And I mean it!" or "...and did I mention you can triple your profits??" which is the bit at the end of the tape left over from the 1994 AMCO salesman I recorded over who is also sick of being asked by my mother how the choir sounded and is trying to change the subject.
6. Spent an afternoon at Costco with previously mentioned mother. Once we finished all the samples we went back through and got our favorite ones again. "They never even remember you," my mom said excitedly, as if she has done this before.
My mom really knows how to keep the season alive.
Double costco samples=Stellar.
Seasons Greetings.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

I started this post four days ago.

It's late.
And by late I mean really late.
And by really late I mean I've slept three hours in the past 48 and I also wrote a 15 page paper today in a 13 hour time period.
As a matter of fact, what in the world am I doing blogging at this hour?

-------------(The next day. Because I went to bed.)---------------------

I got on blogger and typed this ^^^ the day after.
And now, it is the next, next day, and after getting a total of nine hours of sleep in four days and driving home in a snowstorm last night, I just woke my Santa Clara, 3:30 in the afternoon.


I do this every time I come home after finals week. It feels like the weight of the whole semester just hits me once I finally have a second to breathe and think about how little I slept, how much junk I ate, and how many hours I spent reading 16th century British Literature and thinking about how nobody cares that so-and-so's dad won't let them marry their boyfriend because he isn't Lord of Worcheshire (possibly the name of a sauce instead of a place in Britain.)
They probably should have thought about that before you decided to be born in the 1700's.
The great thing about today's world is nearly anyone can marry anyone.

For example, despite the fact that we are from slightly different social classes, and were born over a whole decade apart, my Dad is totally down with me marrying Adrian Grenier.

Right Dad?
Right World?


So here I am, on Christmas break.

I have spent 17/24ths of my day in bed (which, if you know me you know is a dream for me. I love my bed more than almost anything) and have already made four dozen cookies and read half a book.

It doesn't seem like things can get much better, but if they do, I'll let you know...

...I'm going to have plenty of time for blogging this break.

It's a Christmas miracle.


Monday, December 13, 2010

Budget Busters.

I have fully emerged into the life of a college student.

This semester represents new lows for me(or highs, depending on how funny you think this whole situation is, which may be pretty funny).

I have eaten various pasta, cheese, and spaghetti sauce combinations over the last three months. Sometimes pasta with cheese. Sometimes pasta with sauce. Sometimes both if i'm feeling crazy. Last night I hit a new low when I didn't have enough pasta to make a meal so I cooked up what I had, put it all on bread (cheese, sauce and all) and ate a...spaghetti...sandwich...?
This basically describes my new approach to food: eating anything that will fill my stomach and taste somewhat decent if I add enough garlic salt.

I'm pretty sure I got my food creativity from my Dad who made nothing less than barbecued meatloaf (as if meatloaf wasn't bad enough) when I was twelve and my mom went out of town for the weekend.
The sad part is, I'm to the point where I would probably give that one a try if hamburger wasn't out of my budget.

I won't get too far into my other money-saving, college-life shenanigans but they have a lot to do with selling my clothes for rent (consignment anyone?), selling my plasma to pay utilities(free powerade anyone?), and going on a date I was wholly uninterested in for the free meal.
(I am not proud of that last one, but a girls gotta eat)
I just thought I'd give you fellow starving-studenters out there a few survival tips.
You'd be surprised what you can do with a loaf of bread, even when you're out of peanut butter and jelly.

Monday, December 6, 2010

It's fine. It really is.

I have three best girl friends.
And in the last month, within a two week time span:
One got engaged (and boy are they a happy couple)
One got married (and boy are they a beautiful couple)

And one got pregnant (after being engaged, and married. And boy am I not the happy father, I just don't have a picture of the real father on my computer)
Major life changes.
I hear those happen to people.
For one second I was feeling a little left out of the group, until I realized I've undergone some recent major life changes of my own.
Or at least I was sure I had. I just had to think of them.
So, here is my list, none of which involves stressful party planning, having to live with a boy or morning sickness.
1. I cut my bangs on Sunday, all on my own.
2. I've only watched one episode of 30 Rock this week.
Who am I kidding? I always cut my own bangs, and I caught up on all five seasons of 30 Rock so there was only one episode to watch this week.
So my life is slightly less exciting than my three best friends?
I'll live.
I still made a Navajo gingerbread house at a Relief Society activity tonight.
I still just spent the last three minutes contemplating who decided we should use our left hand to type the "b" on a keyboard instead of our right. (It's exactly in the middle! What a conundrum!)
See guys?
Crazy things happen to me too!
The only difference is, nobody throws me a shower to commemorate the fact that I vacuumed my apartment for the first time in a month.
Though it really would be nice if they would. It would also be nice if, for that shower, they would bring us vacuum bags so we don't have to keep borrowing our neighbors vacuum every month or so.
I guess what I'm really trying to say is,
Congrats Aly, Erin and Jenna.
Don't think I'm buying your husbands Christmas presents too, just because you're related to them now.

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Friday Funny Story(ies).

I know it is Saturday and not Friday, but Saturday doesn't start with an F, and I was aiming for alliteration.
I would have posted this yesterday but I kept forgetting my blogger password.
Logical people use the same password for most things they do.
I, instead, like to make up a completely random password every time I need a new one, usually thinking of something completely unrelated to my life or anything normal.
I also change these passwords quite often, just to really mix things up.
To top it off I run two separate e-mail accounts and always forget which one I use where.
It's only after that I realize all of this is the worst idea ever.
I hate so much about the way I choose to be.
(Name the quote^^^for ten bonus points)

Funny Story #1:
On Thursday one of my contacts ripped so I spent most of thursday and friday only being able to see out of one eye, because I didn't have money to get a new pair just yet. (Told you being poor is funny.)
Anyways, the result of seeing 20/20 from one eye and 20/5 million from the other eye was me feeling extremely disoriented and dizzy all day, and also missing my water bottle three times in English 385 due to my lack of depth perception.
I'm still not sure if this is also a side effect, but I dreamed a crazy dream Thursday night that my friend Eric kept posting facebook status updates about onions. (weird? But, a dream, so understandable.) I woke up late the next morning, put in my one contact and rushed out the door to class. On my way that same friend Eric walked out of his apartment and I, still extremely disoriented, made the comment, "So, Eric, what's up with all these facebook updates about onions?"
Oh man.
As soon as I said said it my brain said, "Wait. Dummy. That was a dream!"
I panicked.
"Onions?" said Eric. "Onions?"
"You said that twice." I said. "You said that twice."
Then I didn't know what to do.
If this had been any other normal day, where I could see clearly out of BOTH of my eyes, I would have told him all about the dream and we would have chuckled a bit and moved on.
However, I was feeling way too confused about what just happened, and my brain was on overdrive from trying to decide if that was a door coming at my face or something I should high-five, so I did a terrible thing.
I lied.
"Oh wait," I said, "That must have been my other friend Eric (insert last name here)"
"You have another friend with the exact same name as me?"
More panic.
"Uh...yeah..." I lied more. "I think he's in a cooking class."
Guys. Cut me some slack. Lying with only one eye is harder than it looks (no pun intended.)
I thought about repenting for it, but decided that the creeped out look on Eric's face was punishment enough.
I only have so many friends so I've got to stop pulling stunts like this.

Funny Story #2:
Supervising women's flag football today was awesome.
It was championship day, which always brings out large crowds of obnoxious boyfriends who try and yell instructions to their girlfriends on the field.
They usually yell things like, "Sweetheart, don't run out of bounds. They'll make you stop."
or, more condescendingly,
"What was that call ref?? She didn't even mean to hit her! It was an accident!"
Today's story isn't really a story, but more of a quote.
In the Division III championship, one of the girls missed a catch in the endzone.
Walking back to her team we heard her say,
"Man, guys, that ball is hard to catch! It's like a dreidel!"
A dreidel. What an analogy.

Speaking of which, Happy Hanukkah to all my jewish friends, especially that girl.


Thursday, December 2, 2010

All Girls should get what they want.

I'm aching to travel.
I spend hours that I should be doing homework looking up cheap flights and pictures of places I could see and go and experience.

I want to go back to Berlin. I think it is the idea that I can't be there as easily as I could go somewhere in America that makes me miss it such an unnatural amount.
I miss being around a hundred languages and a thousand different cultures and types of people all at once.

I miss having something to see on every corner, feeling inspired by everything and everyone.

Winter in Provo is grey, but I imagine most of the world is this way during these months.
Everyone hiding behind layers of clothes and thick brick walls.
Everyone freezing. Everyone talking about it.
There is so much to complain about in the winter.
So, I'm going to instead start complaining about my newest obsession: India.
I think most of this obession comes from memories of the movie "A Little Princess," when the little slave girl tells about a pillow she has that reminds her of her home in India. The whole thing makes me feel like I too am living in an attic because some mean orphanage lady was tricked into thinking my rich father was killed in the war.
Which, ironically, makes me think about how unfair life is.

I WANT an India pillow.

I WANT an Indian slave-girl friend.

I WANT to go to India.

How, you might ask, am I going to accomplish all this?
1. Dropping out of school and using my grant money to fund my trip.
2. Locating my long lost father who wasn't actually killed in the war and digging into his funds after using some of them to save the orphanage and my Indian slave-friend.
I have a really good feeling about all of this.
I just can't forget what I learned from Disney all those years ago.

"All girls are princesses...
...And princesses go to India."

(I may have added that last part myself.)


Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Happy Mother's Day.

When I'm having trouble starting a creative writing assignment, I usually try writing a blog post first to get some writing juices going.
It's pathetic that, while it takes me hours to think of something abstract to write about for my class, I can almost instantly start writing about myself/complaining about my life/posting old pictures of my mother that she demands I take down (which I will not take down even though I only barely live far enough away from her that I'm not as scared of her mom-wrath as I used to be.)
Today, instead of doing any of those things, and because I may have burned some bridges with the Leia analogy, I am going to give a shout out to my beautiful mother who does so much for me, puts up with all my quirkiness and often reassures me that someday someone is going to like me for who I am, despite that fact that I dress weird and have a christmas sock fetish.
And just in case it was boring for you to read about how much I love my Mom, I am going to post this funny mom video.
Quit your whining.

I still don't think I'm any closer to starting that assignment, and my second time-wasting idea, watching 30 Rock, is now officially out, seeing as how I finished watching all five seasons in a months time.
New anti-writers-block activity suggestions welcome.

Monday, November 29, 2010


My mom just after high school.
The Princess of Alderaan.
Major Difference: My mom never made out with her long lost twin brother.
Major Similarity: That hair.
In all reality, my mom looks gorgeous. Right guys? (Here's where you all back me up so she doesn't kill me for putting this up here.)
I just couldn't resist using this comparrison to introduce the beginning of a series of holiday posts I will be posting to help us all get a little more into the spirit of the season.
#1: The Star Wars Holiday Special Finale.
This is especially hilarious out of the context of the film because I really have no idea what is going on, I just know that the idea of Christmas with Princess Leia singing to the Rebel Alliance makes me all warm inside.
It sure looks like Darth Vader blows Leia and the rest of the gang to pieces at the end there.
A Christmas present to us all.
That song was too much for me.
Happy Cyber Monday!

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Family Bonding

(photo by the little brother without a cell phone)

What is this world coming to?


Thursday, November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving

I spent the day yesterday decorating for Christmas.
My sister said this is a blasphemous thing to do on Thanksgiving Eve but I am going to be busy starting Friday until around mid-december when I will move home for the holidays so I gave my apologies to the Christmas-Decoration Gods and went ahead with it.
(pictures to come)
My roommates and I don't turn our heater on during the winter.
We live on the second floor so the 1st and 3rd floor heat us enough that we usually stay fairly warm.
The past few days everyone has been gone from the 1st and 3rd floor (and from the rest of Provo. Holidays turn this college town into a ghost town) and so their heat hasn't been on to help me out.
Even though it was freeeezing outside yesterday I was determined to not cave on the heater policy and finally resorted to turning our broiler on and leaving the oven open. Then, whenever I got really cold I would stick my socks in there for a few minutes, put them back on, and keep decorating.
The life of a poor kid is way more exciting/ funnier/ I singed one of my socks.
Today I am headed to Riverton, UT to meet up with my family for some festivities (eating.)
In 4th grade the state of Utah held a drawing contest for all elementary school students to see who could draw the best picture of their favorite place in Utah. The pictures were to be used for a calendar coming out later that year to promote Utah tourism by reminding everyone that even little kids don't get too bored here.
I drew a picture of my Grandparent's backyard in Riverton, my favorite place in Utah at the time (there was a lot of dirt. Almost too much for my brown colored pencil.)
I remember how offended I was when Allison Davison won for her picture of Arches National Park. Who would want to go to that dumb place when they could play in dirt in Riverton, Utah?
I guess I should have cut her some slack, especially considering her name was Allison Davison, which wasn't as bad as my other best friend Shaylee Baylee (true story), but still fairly unfortunate.
I think the local newspaper reporter and I were even more upset when Allison was quoted as saying, "I never even been to that place. I just seen it on those license plates."
(I was probably more upset about her grammar than anything. Even back then I was an English snob.)
List of things to be grateful for this Thanksgiving holiday:
1. Broilers
2. Riverton. Still one of my favorite places in Utah.
3. Parents with the decency to sound out my name before they wrote it on the certificate.
Man, I feel blessed.
But seriously, I do.
Life is grood.


Tuesday, November 23, 2010

I almost die way too often.

I'm going to make this really long story short (No I'm not. You know me.):
We drove through the worst snowstorm I've ever been in, spun off the road, got back on, and then hit a road block in Beaver, UT.
Right now you are asking yourself a few questions.
1. Why did we attempt to drive through this storm?
2. Where/what in the world is Beaver, UT?
3. Why am I watching "Extreme Makeover Home Edition" at 1 in the morning and crying (like any human with a soul does when watching this show) while I write this?
Quite honestly I have no answer to #1 or #3. However, I CAN attempt to answer #2.
Let's start with Arshels...
This is the cafe we stopped at after our brutal last 26 miles (that took us almost two hours) into Beaver through a blinding snowstorm. We were pretty shaken up and freezing by the time we got here and our waitress Patti (the only one in the cafe) was such a sweetheart.

I ordered one of those Scooby-Doo sandwiches where there is three full layers of bread between all the other ingredients. I've always wanted one of those. Who knew I'd find it in Beaver, Utah?

Next stop: a vacant chapel where all the stranded people who weren't smart/rich enough to get one of the six motel rooms in Beaver were camping out.
Yes we were only there for two hours, and yes we were on facebook and drinking chocolate milk for most of it, but I still consider myself a surviving refugee of a natural disaster.
Also there was a moment when I was pretty sure we were on the set of an apocalyptic movie when I looked around the room and saw a group of ethnic minorities in one corner, a woman in a wheelchair in the other, and two awkward looking parents with their teenage gothic children against the wall.
We obviously played the group of young college girls with uncanny scientific knowledge, two of whom will wander off into the dark and not make it through the elements, while the other two survive, meet up with attractive, similarly aged boys (preferably Adrian Grenier in his younger years) and agree to repopulate the earth at some point after the credits.
Proof of the cold: It looks like this man is wearing every layer he owns.
Nine hours after departure we found ourselves back in Provo, Ut.
Thank you Beaver for the adventure.
As far as small towns named after strange animals go, you guys are alright.
I'll close with this funny picture of my parking job at church.
The one in the middle is mine.
At least we didn't have to drive that guy through the storm.
For anyone who is traveling for the holidays, travel safe please.
And should you happen to get stranded somewhere, I hope it is near an Arshel's.
That club sandwich is hard to beat.


Just call her Mrs. Hafen.

Here she is. Married.

Sunday, November 21, 2010


So there we were, cleaning up after Erin's wedding...
I was carrying an armload of presents out to a suburban where a fifteen year old boy named Adam was loading them up. A big crowd of ten or eleven adults (all who were strangers to me) were also carrying presents out.
Someone makes the comment: "Wow, Adam is such a helper."
At first I meant to say, "Yeah, what a champ!"
And then mid-sentenced I switched to deciding to say "What a trooper!"
What actually came out: "Yeah! What a TRAMP!"
It's a good thing I'm not chinese or I would bring dishonor to my family daily.

Saturday, November 20, 2010


I know I've been talking about this a lot, but I felt the need to dedicate a special post to this event.
In less than eight hours my best friend/cousin/roommate/sister/other half is getting married.
Its funny how there are specific events in our lives that always make us reflect on our relationships with the people closest to us. Marriage is definitely one of those events and there is much to reflect on with this one.
Erin and I have been best friends since birth. Up until I moved away to college, I can't remember a 4th of July, Halloween or Christmas without her. I have slept more nights at her house, using my finger as a toothbrush because of our last-minute planning, than I can even calculate.
She has been there for me through all of it.
Interest wise we have always been polar opposites. She's a little bit Taylor Swift, I'm a little bit Radiohead. She dances, I play soccer. She dresses classy no matter where she is, I would have a hard time finding a sweater in my closet without a hole in it somewhere.
And yet we have never even had a real fight.
Life with Erin is just easy.

(*our favorite thing is that Erin's name is inside my name. Proof that we are soul mates.)

I wish I had pictures on my computer that went further back, ones from the beach in Hawaii as babies, in third grade when I was a skeleton for halloween and Erin was Pippy Longstocking, the time we made the homemade music video of that Aaron Carter song or getting ready for our first proms.
I have lived a short twenty-one years and Erin has only lived a month and a half longer than that, but it seems like so much more when I think about everything that we've been through and experienced.
Erin, here's to Broc still letting us have sleepovers when I come down for weekends.
Thanks for being my best friend and my sister.


Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Quiz Question.

Goodness gracious. Today was nuts.
Ima recap for ya.
But you're not getting any pictures yet. Its currently 2 a.m. ya goofs.
Why in the world would I be putting pictures up at this hour?
Alright, here it is, my day as a multiple choice question, in honor of the test I took today.
Please select the best answer for the following question:
What was the best part of my day?
A. Woke up at 7 a.m. It was the craziest thing. There I was, awake at 7 in the morning, and so were other people. At least I'm pretty sure they were. I could hear moving out my window but I wasn't about to look. I don't trust the kind of people who get up before 8. Who do they think they are?
B. I drove to Lindon, UT. You've never heard of it. I think its a suburb of Orem, which is a suburb of Provo, which is basically a suburb of Salt Lake City, the capital of Utah, a state that is pretty much one big suburb.
C. I took the G.R.E. But before I took the G.R.E. (B.5?) I took the G.R.E. Tutorial. This consisted of sections such as "How to Use a Mouse" and "Scrolling." It then gave sample questions so I could practice answering using the confusing mouse and scroll button. My sample question: "What is the capital of the United States?" (one of the options was London. Whoops.)
The problem was, this question not only offered a false sense of security about the level of difficulty of the upcoming test, but it made me really grumpy that I was not in London, or Washington D.C. (yes, I answered correctly) or even in my bed where I usually am every morning at 8:34. I was in Lindon, UT and I was taking a four hour test that determined my future.
Not to worry however, things got much better after Juan, the proctor, let me have two drink breaks and let me go to my locker for gum after one of them.
D. I ate at the dorm cafeteria with my sister and they had lettuce wraps.
Mmm baby.
E. I came home and sat on my couch.
F. I took a shower. As a college student I am under no obligation to do this every day. Except today I did. Above and beyond, thats my modo.
G. I ate at Burgers Supreme using the discount food text I get every day. Quote from the middle eastern man at the register when he informed me that my food would be out faster than my brother's and Spencer's: "I have a wife, a grandmother, a grandaughter, three daughters, a mother, an aunt, neices, sisters...(went on to name nearly all major female figures in his life, and the world)...I know that ladies go first." And I'll be darned if my guacamole burger didn't come out a whole three minutes before Spencer's spicy chicken.
He wasn't kidding. He knows.
H. Went to work where I supervised volleyball games tonight. Received some visits from a few friends. Drew some pictures. Re-wrote the finale of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air in my head so they don't all move away and Jeffrey can keep his job as the sassiest butler ever. Got paid for it.
I. The Jazz won tonight. BYU won tonight.
J. Stayed up Which is 2:19. Working on a wedding present for this girl, and hemming a pair of pants for my friend Marcus.
K-Y. Kentucky
Z. Somehow it is 2:28 a.m. and Michelle Branch just came up on my shuffle. When Miss Branch gets in there, thats a pretty good indicator that it is time for bed.
Answer: E. I'm so lazy.
Goodbye to you. (catch the reference)

Sunday, November 14, 2010

Funny Story:

This yellow sweater is my favorite sweater (sorry I think I've used this picture on my blog before, but this is the only shot I could find of it).
It is big, comfy, warm and I like the color and look of it, especially since I'm really digging the baggy look these days. It's one of those articles of clothing that a lot of people comment on but I can't tell if they are complimenting me because it is weird enough to notice, or if they actually like it. Either way I don't really care because I'm obsessed with it.
Actual Story which is much shorter than the backstory:
I walk into the Wilkinson Center for lunch, wearing this sweater.
Roommate who will remain unnamed: "Oh my gosh, I totally forgot it was ugly sweater day!"
Post-story commentary:
It really was ugly sweater day. I just missed the memo.
The worst part was walking past people I knew and watching them smile and say "yeah...nice sweater" and chuckle, as if them thinking my favorite sweater was part of ugly sweater day is a funny joke.

Blast my timing.


Saturday, November 13, 2010

Heard it on the Radio.

I am always really careful to not watch the movie "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with any boy I am dating.

I'm just afraid that we will break up and then I will be driving around and I will hear the song "Breakfast at Tiffany's" and what would be more sad/ironic than that?

90's one-hit-wonders are always the most emotional/have the most terrible music videos.
Other life observations as of late:
1. There is a "preview" button on blogger so I can see what I have written looks like before I have to publish it. By the looks of my blog you can probably tell that I am not too tech-savvy.
2.You may also be able to make that observation by looking at my laptop which folds in half backwards if someone in the room even sneezes its direction. It's been busted that way for months and I always think it is really funny when that happens so I refrain from fixing it for the sake of a good laugh every once in a while. "Having no money makes everything funnier." Thats what my friend Tim said to me last night and I couldn't agree more.
3. Even if Smith's is having a reallllly good sale on Pasta, you should not spend your last $5.34 on ten packages of it. Eating pasta for a week makes everything less funny.
4. Hypothetically speaking, you should never buy tickets to an event more than a week in advance if you plan on going with a person you are interested in. Chances are, in the month between the ticket purchase and the actual show, they will start dating your friend, stop talking to you, and then you will still have to go to said event as a mandatory assignment for your class, and then you will spend all Saturday thinking how you don't care if Romeo kills himself, Juliet, or everyone in the audience, you do not want to go to the stupid play. Hypothetically speaking, of course.
5. It doesn't matter how many times I tell someone at work they are going to have to shave before I can let them play intramural football, they will respond with the phrase, "are you serious?"
What kind of joke would that be? Of course I'm serious.
6. "Icky Thump" by The White Stripes is my angry song this week. I haven't really been angry but sometimes when I listen to it, I think that I just might be. Which is ironically relaxing.
7. It bothers me that there is no good synonym for ironic. I feel it a lot so I use it a lot and, as an English major, I hate to be so redundant.
8. I'll say, what about Romeo and Juliet?
And he'll say, well, that's the one thing we've got.
That song gets me even when I didn't watch the stupid movie.


Friday, November 12, 2010


I am in a rut.
I spent almost the entire day yesterday on my couch sick, and tired.
Some days life just catches up with you and your couch seems like the safest place to be until things get back to normal.

I have a knack for forgetting birthdays. I forgot my best friend Jenna's 20th birthday a few years ago and I still feel sick to my stomach when I think about it.
This may seem strange but the concept behind birthdays bothers me. Opposite from most people, I usually am so relieved when my birthday is over every year. I hate the pressure of the day, of feeling like something about it has to be extraordinary or else it is wasted until next year. I hate people giving me things when I feel like I have done nothing to deserve them. I get embarrassed by the attention. I get overwhelmed by the blatant presentation of the idea that I am, in fact, getting older. I understand the concept of every person having "their day" where they can feel special, and I love to allow that for those who want it, but as for me, I could get along just fine without a birthday.
Man, don't I sound like such a cynic?
I'm just trying to be honest.
All of these emotions are coming up today because this week I forgot the birthday of someone who means a whole lot to me. It was one of those moments where you realize you have done something terrible, something you never wanted to do, but something you did regardless and that you would give anything to take back.
That may seem a little dramatic but I think those feelings came less from the act of forgetting itself and more from being faced with the realization that I have been a selfish person lately. I have been far too concerned with my own problems to remember that I am no island, that the world is big and full of people who have things like math tests and unpaid bills and birthdays.
And so, to the person whose birthday I forgot, someone who has been so kind and good to me, I am sorry. You probably will never read this, but I hope you somehow know that all this has inspired a change in me. I'm going to start getting over myself.
Birthdays are important, lives are important, people are important.
Lesson learned.


Wednesday, November 10, 2010

The Jazz beat the Heat and I always talk about sports in my posts which may be annoying so I'll put it in the title which everyone skips anyways.

This post contains an absurd amount of photos.
But I'm not going to apologize. Because maybe you are having a busy day and have better things to do than sit and read all the junk that I write down.
Welcome to the 2000's. The era of speeeeeeed.
Which is exactly what my last few weeks have felt like.
Check it out.
A big stress in my life is whether or not I should put the caption for pictures up here...
...or down here. ^^ This picture is of my friends C.J. and Sarai who just so happened to be traffic jammed next to us on our way to the Sufjan Stevens concert in SLC.
This ^^ is Sarai getting a fake autograph from a person who is NOT Sufjan Stevens. Apparently fans who wait after to meet him and talk to him and worship him and caress his magic, music-playing fingers are creepy to him? Geez man. We just like your stuff.

The best way to have your nice glass baking pan is shattered in tiny pieces all over your kitchen and living room.
Seriously, the WEIRDEST things happen to our apartment. This one happened while Jessica and I were sitting back in our room and nobody was even out in the kitchen. Except for the robber from last year who I am convinced came back and threw our pan on the floor out of spite.
Let it out robber. Let it out.

Me. My dad. A climbing wall. There is nothing I hate more than looking like a wuss, and climbing walls can make ANYONE feel like a wuss.
(Side note: I learned how to spell the word "wuss" from my favorite Disney Channel Original Movie, "Brink.")

Eli Wade and blue skies. Two favorite things of mine.

We went on a long ATV ride and got dirrrtttyyy.

Every family has their thing. Some families watch movies together, play board games, tell each other they love each other (if you're into that). My family...wrestles...

...and arm wrestles.
(if you are wondering if my Mom beat me here then you should shut the heck up.)

This photograph was taken on the drive home in Mt. Caramel, UT. I get the feeling they are trying to be trashy. But its hilarious. So it evens out.

I came home to find my best friend is ENGAGED!!
I'm just going to give you the facts here...
Best High School Friend Jenna...married.
Best Life-long Friend/Cousin Erin...married in two weeks!
Best Provo Friend Aly...engaged to be married. the dream.

One day I'll catch up with them but first I have to stop doing things like eating multiple meals off of the same plate because I'm too lazy to wash another one.
Besides, I'm enjoying all these awkward first dates way too much to settle down with just one of them.

Also, I just have to say it.
Go Jazz.

Monday, November 8, 2010


Wrote another article for
Check it out here.
Sorry if you're not from Provo/don't understand BYU culture. But I'd still like it if you read it.
You can even comment if you want!
The great part is I am going to put a link to this blog post on my facebook, even though this post is actually a link to another blog.
Somehow I think that is a really good joke.
Double linking. Ha. What a waste of time.
I've been in the library waaayyyy too long.

Saturday, November 6, 2010


Sorry about the week-long hiatus guys.

It's been an interesting week for me and I really needed to take the extra time to think through some things and re-evaluate my life and boring stuff like that.

I am always really torn when I have weeks like this over whether or not I should share my personal experiences with the blogging world. I'm not a fan of sharing my personal life with the general public, but then I think, it would make my blog more interesting if I added some drama.

Then I remember the line from one of my favorite short stories "Snow" by Ann Beattie.

"Any life will seem dramatic if you omit mention of most of it."

And so, for dramatic effect, I will omit.
Maybe one day I'll let you know how things worked out.

On a lighter note, my family is staying at Zion Ponderosa Resort for the weekend. My dad does some marketing here so we get to come spend a weekend here every year. This is my first time being able to come and it has NOT dissapointed.

I plan on posting all about it when I get home, but in the mean time, here are a few funny Rachel stories from the drive out here:

Story #1: Rachel and I were arguing because she had a shirt of mine (my favorite shirt) and did not want to give it back without some sort of collateral (I suggested a punch in the face). Finally in frustration Rachel exclaimed "Katie, stop being so controversial!" "Rachel," I said, "you don't even know what that word means." Now, Rachel is infamous for using large words incorrectly, however she still protested and suddenly started texting, all the time continuing the argument. A few seconds later she says "Well Katie...for example...the death penalty would be controversial...or something like that..." I thought that was kind of a strange comment and tried to explain to her how she had used the word wrong in the context. When she wouldn't believe me I finally resorted to texting google for the definition to prove myself and when I got a text back, this is what I read.

" Controversial: marked by or capable of arousing controversy; Example: the issue of the death penalty is highly controversial."

Whoops. Looks like someone else was texting google as well.

Story #2: Jordan, Rachel and I were sitting at a table at Wendy's discussing random facts we knew. Rachel pipes in with this one:

"Okay guys...true or false, 68% or crimes are committed by black people, or white people?"


And my final happy thought for the day...these football scores:


UofU-7 TCU-47

Also, did anyone else think Utah's jerseys looked like little kid pajamas with patches of dinosaur print fabric? And the words on the back of them?

I mean, I take my teams pretty seriously, but I would hate to be the 300 lb. football player running around the field with the word "community" on my back where my name should be. Especially if I lost 47-7.

Go cougs.