Sunday, October 31, 2010

Sun-eyed Girl

Because I am a Mormon, and Sundays are our day off from partying, my Halloween was Saturday this year.
And party we did.
"We" being J-Marsh and myself.
I'm going to start off by apologizing right now if this post comes across as severely melodramatic. Marsha and I are watching "Invictus" as I type and there's something about Morgan Freeman with a South African accent that is making me feel like its my personal responsibility to salvage all that is good in the world.
I'll tell you something I didn't salvage...

We started off the night with a delicious dinner, which I burned.
We then re-started the night with a better delicious dinner, which I did NOT burn, after which we changed into our costumes:
I know, I know, I always claim I'm not a real girly kind of girl. But somehow, to me, a giant flower in scrubs and a tank top from the kids section of Savers just didn't feel too girly to me. Also, look at the picture. Not exactly feminine grace.
Next on the list, naturally, was a good old Straight Monday show.

Question: If you were going to imagine the Prince of Russia, what would you imagine?
Answer: This. ^^^

Question: If you were going to imagine two Harlem Globetrotters, what would you imagine?
Answer: When I got home I had brown paint all over my arms from the sweat of these two. Gross.

We finished off the night with some delicious pumpkin cake and cocoa motion at my friend Bryce's apartment, and then "The Birds" at Tracy's boyfriend Kyle's house.

Quick Review of "The Birds": Worst. Ending. Ever. following a close-up of some guy's eyes eaten out. But in a weird way I kind of liked it.

Happy Halloween!


Wednesday, October 27, 2010

30 Snow Moms

I have been ending my days with an episode of 30 Rock.
It gives me something to look forward to throughout the day and is my way of saying to myself
"Congrats! You made it! Have twenty-one minutes of hilarious television!"

The episode I watch at night is very different from the one I watch when I wake up in the morning that says "Congrats! You're out of cereal and you forgot to go shopping again last night!" Or the one I watch before work that says "Congrats! You have nothing better to do between homework and work than hang out with your fake friend Tina Fey!"

Slowly but surely 30 Rock is filling all major voids in my life.

And speaking of unbearably endless voids...winter seems to have arrived.
Last night Provo saw its first snow of the season. I also saw my first snow of the season but it was a little more blurry looking at it through tears of disgust.
As a former life-long resident of sunny St. George the snow is something that does nothing less than ruin my life.

Exhibit A: My roommates and I, last year after one of the first snows of the season.

We are not smiling. We were not happy.

The only good part about the snow this time was that I woke up to a big can of Stephen's hot chocolate on my front porch and a very nice note from my friend Jourdan Smith giving his winter condolences.

How sweet is that? Even though I'm quite upset about the snow still, it did make me feel a little bit warmer and quite a bit happier.

And speaking of people I love...

my mom sent the funniest text to Jordan, Rachel and I the other day.

Every year on the monday before Halloween my family decorates Halloween cookies and takes them to all the neighbors. I know for most families, this is a Christmas tradition, but my family has never been very conventional so for us, Halloween is cookie time.

Seeing as how Halloween is this weekend, last monday was "the monday" and as I was sitting in my bed that evening doing homework (watching 30 Rock) I got this text:

"First one to text the correct answer to this question gets $20 in their bank account: What do we always do for FHE the last Monday of October?"

Now, being the kind of girl who lives by her phone, I obviously won, responding with "COOKIES!" within .8 seconds. I just wish that all my tests here at school had such easy questions, produced the same reward, and were based on me being a really fast texter.

What a cute mom I have.

My bank account agrees.


Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Academy Hill

I was asked by my friend Josh Dance to write an article as a guest writer for an online BYU blog he is working on.
It is called "The Academy Hill" and the article I wrote can be found here.
Feel free to read and comment, and check back for other articles and blog posts to be found on the website.

Danke schön!


Sunday, October 24, 2010

What. A. Weekend.

Geez Louise. I had a great weekend.
Friday night my family got into town just in time to watch the first favorite child (Jordan) play in his flag football game. Rachel (fifth favorite child) had a co-ed basketball game at the same time but after I explained to her birthrights, attractiveness levels, etc. she understood the decision that was made.
The good part for me was that Jordan's game was played on the field I was supervising so I conveniently got to politely ask my mother and little brother to return to the white box designated for fans every time they stepped out of it.
Telling your mom what to do.
What a power trip.
Good thing I have a sweet enough mother that she puts up with me, even when I get a kick out of things like that.
After work I headed to yet another Straight Monday show.

(Straight Monday, as pictured below laughing candidly. Not faking it.)

What made this show unique was that my little brother Eli was in town to attend it.
Fun fact about me: I am obsessed with dancing. Obsessed.
Surprising fact about Eli: He is too.
Who knew? He's only 13.
Shoot, when I was 13 I felt about as comfortable with dancing as I felt watching that kid on Matilda eat the whole sweaty chocolate cake.
Both made me feel a little queasy.
But not Eli. He even went as far as to jump in the middle of a dance circle and go crazy.
What a star.
I miss him already.
(this picture SCREAMS thirteen)
Saturday morning was family visits and a football game.
It was so nice to see my cougs win again. I'm no fairweather fan (Ironically enough it was pouring rain during the game and we still went. That should be proof.) but its hard to watch your team have an off season.
For the record though, in case Jake Heaps gets waaay better and is one of the best QB's to come out of college football, he has always been my boy.
I have said that from game one and I'm sticking to it.
Just in case.
I have a sense for these kind of things.

(Marsha and I at the game)
Saturday Night was my friend Casey Goodman's Birthday Party.
So, naturally, we made pumpkin helmets and played football in them.
And by we, I mean the boys played football.
But I watched, photographed, and laughed my head off.
Don't try and tell me this picture isn't the best thing ever.

I won't believe you.


Thursday, October 21, 2010

I really don't have time for this. You're welcome.

Thursday is the new Friday.
Once I finish my long block of classes Thursday afternoon and get off work, the weekend is on.

Today's Thursday ( was interesting enough that I am more than ready for the weekend.

The first part was my own fault.

I wore mustard yellow tights to school.


I sure didn't think I looked like a freak, but every person walking past me did. I'm really not that mad about it though. How I dress is never really a concern for me. Except for when it comes to first dates, THEN I get really stressed. It's so hard to find a good balance between "I dressed down a little bit so you wouldn't judge me and think I was super crazy based on the clashing colors and patterns of every article of clothing I'm wearing" and "If this is ever going to go anywhere you should probably know that I dress weird." As if first dates weren't bad enough...

The second part of my day involved having "Teenage Dream" stuck in my head all. day. long.

I'm just going to say it, Katie Perry is a terrible person.That song is ridiculous and downright uncalled for. Or if someone did call for it, that wasn't very nice (or tasteful) of them. I really wish she would stop promoting things like making a joke out of PMS (whose side is she on here?) and California Pride (there's already enough to go around.) I think what Katie Perry really needs is a good hug, but just in case I think I'm going to start going by my real name, Katherine, just to unassociate myself.

The third part of my day is called homeworkmidtermsgreapplicationsworkworkworksoccergamemoreworkhomework.

That is seriously how my brain feels right now.

Waaaa. My life is so hard. I'm a whinny little girl.

One who wears yellow tights.

And whose life really isn't that hard.


Wednesday, October 20, 2010

New Obsession.

I've watched 7 episodes in 2 days.
I don't know how it took me 5 seasons to discover this show.
Forget Glee.
Tracy Morgan can get me through any show-tune withdrawl Fox can throw at me.


Sunday, October 17, 2010


Katie: "Hey Jessica, what should I write about?"
Jessica Marshall: "How much you love me."
I do Marsha, I really do.

Marsha is what we call her to differentiate between the two Jessica's in my apartment.
Other nicknames include: "Marsh", "Marshmellow", "Marshed Potatoes," "Martian" and my personal favorite, "dummy."
(Marsha, as pictured here)

(The resemblance is really uncanny.)

In the spirit of retaliation Marsha once spent an entire weekend calling me "roommate" to see if I'd notice.

I didn't.

She is currently taking suggestions for better options of retribution nicknames.

Marsha and I are the losers of the apartment. The other two roommates, who will remain unnamed (love you Tracy and Jessica) both have boyfriends, meaning Marsh and I get to spend real quality time together alone in the apartment on a daily basis.

Tonight's Activity: Max Keeble's Big Move

In reality it is the only thing on TV right now that doesn't involve following Alaskan fisherman drama or polygamist sister wives, but I still remember it being better than this.

I guess sticking it to your snappy 4th period teacher and the school bully in one fell swoop* just doesn't tickle my fancy the way it used to.

I guess when you don't have a boyfriend you just deal with stuff like this.


*comes from the play Macbeth. My Shakespeare class is taking over my life.

Thursday, October 14, 2010


I have spent the past two days obsessively following an online debate between over 50,000 people concerning a rather prominent issue in our country at the moment.
It took me hours and hours of reading comments and resisting harsh responses to realize how absurd the whole thing was. Even after hundreds of thousands of comments, we weren't getting anywhere, and we probably never will if we keep going about it that way.

It reminds me of how silly conversations on Youtube videos are.
Have you ever been watching the most ridiculous or random video and you scroll down to find that there is a 157-comment-argument ensuing over whether or not the weird singing girl in the video could make it big if she got rid of her pigtails and stopped wearing that cat sweater?

(visual aid: your aunt in a cat sweater.)
And the people are legitimately outraged about it.
I always wonder what kind of people have that kind of time, to sit around and rage over animal themed cardigans.

A funny example is a video my brother made with his friends their freshman year in the dorms.
It is an air band cover of "More Than A Feeling."

If you know anything about these boys, or just general social norms, this video was obviously meant to be a good joke.


Not only does this goofy video currently have 13,546 views...
...but there are legitimate arguments ensuing in the commentary.

Here are a few of my favorites (edited for content. Yes, someone took an air band video seriously enough to include "content"):

"This sucked ********. Absolutely pathetic. Go learn how to play real instruments instead of making yourselves look like *************."

"seriously, am i the only one who thinks people look stupid doing this? how about learning to actually play?"

Then there is some constructive criticism:

"singer is pretty good, drums good too, but bass and guitar could relaly do a better job... feel the song guys"

And the good news is there is also these precious comments:

"This is Awesome!! Me and a few friends are trying to put an air band together to perform in our high school talent show. We would greatly appreciate it if you could give us any pointers on making it look more realistic. Thanks."

"Don't let the negative comments get you down. It's hard out there. As a fellow air-bander, I know. You guys look great."

The lesson I learned today: Arguing major issues on the internet can directly lead to arguing over air-band covers of Boston songs, which can directly lead to being the girl with the pigtails and the cat sweater.

I'm going to quit while I'm ahead.


Two major disappointments in my life:


This weeks episode was unnecessarily inappropriate. Which is so unfortunate because the characters are hilarious, the songs are incredible and I use the upbeat nature of the show to be my hour break from the week.
BUT, I'm a girl who likes to keep it clean, so, Glee's got to go.
I could really use an extra hour in my week anyways.

# 2. I actually forgot the other one. Must not have been that bad.
haha. I like my life.


Sunday, October 10, 2010

Katie's Fun Facts for the Day:

1. I feel really uncomfortable around mascots of any kind. I don't like the idea that any old person could be running around high-fiving the fans or promoting tooth care like this guy in the picture. I just don't imagine too many nice and normal people willing to spend their afternoons in a sweaty suit dragging around little children and performing stunts on command. My default hypothesis is that Wanda Barzee is in the suit just waiting until nobody's watching so she can snatch me up and take me home to good old Brian David. My other guess is that there is a kidnapped teenage girl in there with her mouth duct taped shut doing all those weird flips and stuff as a secret signal to set her free. Which do I pick? Do I rip the head off and release the poor girl to her freedom, or do I wrestle the thing to the ground and call the police to let them know those two crazies have escaped?
I usually choose to avoid the whole situation entirely in order to bypass the moral dilemma.
(which is why I look so uncomfortable in this picture)
2. My brother plays keyboard for a cover band called "Straight Monday" (this as opposed to gay tuesday). This is him playing at their Katie Perry cover party. I just thought you should know that while I hate Katie Perry, I willingly went to this party in support of my brother. Let this be a lesson to you kids, that sacrifices must be made in the name of family. Yes, yes, even when it involves Katie Perry music. 3. I am currently conducting a week-long experiment during which I am listening only to instrumental and/or religious music, not watching TV or movies, and staying away from facebook. It's not like I think music, TV, movies or facebook are bad things, by any means. I just want to see if I notice a difference in my life by removing the ideas of the media, hollywood, musicians and my peers who I am less connected to and just focusing on what I see as important and wholesome in my life. I am going to attempt to switch my focus to the people around me and what they need. You are welcome to join me or even start your own week-long quest. If you do, I'd like to hear about it.

4. I am currently writing this post from my secret spot in the HBLL. This is my fourth year at this university and I have yet to be discovered. This is not a challenge to come find me. In fact, please don't, I need my quiet to study for the huge Shakespeare test I have to take by 10 p.m. tonight. However, being down here DOES remind me of a funny story:
It was my sophomore year in college and I had an hour break between classes so I decided to head to my secret spot to take a quick power-nap. I got to my spot, spread out with my head on my backpack and my jacket as a blanket, set my alarm on my phone and fell asleep (I can sleep anywhere, at any time.) I woke up a little groggy and started to pack up when I suddenly realized that there was a boy sleeping next to me! And I'm not talking about in the same general area. There literally was about three feet TOPS between us. This didn't seem as weird as it really should have to me until about ten minutes later when I was fully awake and it dawned on me that I had just spent the last hour sleeping next to some strange man in a secluded corner of the library. I shrugged it off mostly because there was nothing I could do about it then, but I avoided napping there for the next few weeks.

Weirder things have happened? Probably not.


Friday, October 8, 2010


I just hate it when I can go three days without charging my phone.
I swear I have enough friends to use up my battery.
Just none of them call me... Or text me... Or talk to me...

I don't have any friends.

As I was driving home tonight from working five hours in the rain with a terrible cold (unnecessary details I added so that you could feel super bad for me) I thought about why this is, and I think I figured it out.

I don't know any of the "cool kid" music these days.

And by "cool kid" music I mean rap/hip-hop.

And by rap/hip-hop I mean I hate it.

So, rather than try and force myself into submerging into an entire music genre that gives me the same feeling in my stomach as I get when I burp and hiccup at the same time (unexpectedly painful), I decided to try and convince everyone that I am right, in hopes of gaining some friends back along the way.

The start of this whole process went like this:

My roommate Jessica Esplin (there are two Jessicas so I had to clarify on the last name, don't stalk her) and her boyfriend Brady walk in.

(Visual Aid: Picture of them on their trip to Paris. I mean Vegas. Never fools anyone.)

Me: Hey Jessica. You know that song with the airplanes and the shooting stars?

Jessica: Yes, I love that song.

Me: Do you know what it's called?

Jessica: No....Do you Brady?

Brady: No.

Me: Can you name a line from it?

Jessica: No...can you Brady?

Brady: No.

Me: I hate this project. I'll never have friends.

So after a thorough search of the internet typing various things into the search box such as "songs to make me more gangster"(don't exist) and "songs sung by a really promiscuous black girl with the token sex-rap in the middle" I realized that I don't know the name to any other hip hop songs either and that ended that.

I guess I'll have to make friends the old-fashioned way: World of Warcraft.

(Jokes on you, I don't know how to play videogames)

What I really mean is, you guys are just going to have to accept me for who I am, even with my lack of knowledge concerning pop culture.

I expect at least nine texts and three party invites tonight.


p.s.- If you were wondering, that song is called "Airplanes." Clever.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Ich bin Krank.

For all you non-deutsch speakers that title means "I am sick."
Which I am.
This usually happens at the beginning of every summer and the beginning of every fall, I get sick with the season changes, providing yet another example of how incredibly poor I am at handling change.

I have also spent the week missing Germany.

I think the main logic behind this is that living in another country automatically makes whatever problems are happening over here more a funny joke than anything.
I distinctly remember sitting on my bed in my apartment in downtown Berlin and getting on facebook to read messages of drama and problems from home and just...laughing.
That's way rude.
I should never admit that on my blog.
But, if anyone is offended by that I hope you will take a minute and think about how enticing it sounds to be buried in a large city in another country and just laughing at all of life's problems.

(This was my bed in Berlin. I promise it wasn't usually this messy, this is just from me packing up. If anyone from BYU computer rentals is reading I did not take a school issued computer all the way to Europe with me. uh....)

I think the best day of all of them was the day Nick and I went to Wansee and spent the day on the beach. Almost all of our friends had left for the weekend and we didn't really tell anyone else our plans. Laying on one of the prettiest beaches I've ever been to, soaking in the warm sun and the quiet that comes from not being in a city, in a corner of the world where nobody knows where you are so nobody can come to bother you...

...Leaving the country is definitely not the solution, but boy did it feel like it.

Take me back.


Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Today I am a skeptic.

It was one of those days.
I am lucky enough that nearly all my days are happy and stimulating and progressive,
but today was full of digression and stagnancy.
I find myself forgetting that its okay to have days like this.
That sometimes its okay to bask in the fact that life is hard.

A boy from the neighborhood I grew up in got struck by lightning today standing right outside of my high school. I watched the news clips when I got home from work tonight and they kept showing pictures of the tree he was standing by.
I have stood by that tree.
I have spent a thousand afternoon minutes standing in its shade,
but the lighting didn't strike me.

I guess that is the way life works.
Sometimes the lightning strikes us, and sometimes it is the next guy.
Though, for all my metaphors, nothing will change the fact that the boy was burned and this is the thought that has risen above all my personal problems today.
We can't change the terribly difficult things that happen to us but we can be a friend to the ones who are going through it as well, and we can contribute to the good that is in the world.
Keep a boy named Alex Lambson in your prayers.
Then, find yourself a reason to smile.

Here's mine:

My family is my happy thought, my faith is my strength.
Life is good, even when it's bad.

Monday, October 4, 2010

The thing about a Marathon is...

...that the first guy to run one died as he finished. What I really want to know is, who in the world was the first person to say "hey. that killed him. I think I'll give that a try."

I woke up sick today, more than likely a product of the heat exhaustion and overall torture of my body Saturday.
I spent the day on my couch and had a lot of time to think about how I actually felt during the marathon, and I've also had a lot of time to read blogs of people who also ran the marathon Saturday.
There seemed to be a consensus among bloggers and other people I've talked to about the race and it is this:
Somewhere around mile 18 life got really tough.

And that, without question, was the case for me.
Up until that point I felt awesome. I even remember thinking:
"I don't know what everyone is talking about. This is embarrassingly low-key."

This is a laughable thought when compared to what I was thinking around mile 23, which was:
"I will give birth to 1,000 children while simultaneously ripping my fingernails out with those floss needles they give you when you get braces so you can floss between the wires before I run another mile of this awful race."

You may think that last statement was a little graphic when in reality it is the severely edited version from what I was really thinking.
Pain. A lot. of. pain.

I spent mile 18 and 19 yelling at myself, in my head, to keep going. This had a limited affect because it had gotten so hot that even my mental arguments had become delirious, which is why it was a miracle when I ran past my friend Cheryl Yip who just so happened to also be running the marathon.
For the next 7 miles I got yelled at in her little Singaporean voice (because she's from Singapore so she speaks Singaporie, a language offered at select high schools in central California where there is a large concentration of Singapites) which was exponentially more encouraging considering the fact that the voice in my own head had drifted more to the "quit now and go buy a Dr. Pepper" side of things.

I (literally) ran into quite a few people I knew throughout the course of the race, which was kind of weird. I'd like to think that seeing people on the course of a marathon is pretty similar to what it would be like to be in Hades' big river of dead souls that always freaked (freaks?) me out when I watched (watch?) Hercules.
You're all just floating along the same downward spiral and you can chat and make jokes and compare Ipods or whatever but when it really comes down to it, you're all just on a direct route to hell.

Okay, okay, so I'm making this sound terrible. The unfair thing about marathons is that the worst part is at the end.
In reality, I could go on forever about how inspiring it was to stand on the starting line with 7,500 other people who have been training for months for that very moment. Or how beautiful it was to see the sun rise over the red mountains I love so much. Or how much I appreciate the volunteers who handed out gatorade, water, and oranges and who icy-hotted my legs at every single aid station the second half of the race.

And the finish line. I am NOT a crier, but I did come awfully close. If it hadn't have been for the thousands of strangers standing there watching I probably would have lost it right there.
What an emotionally transcendent experience to push your body to the ultimate limits like that.
Approaching that finish line, I turned to Cheryl and said,
"Cheryl............we ran a marathon."
And we high-fived as we crossed.
Because nothing says "I've been to hell and back" quite like slapping palms with a Singapite.
You're the best Cheryl. :) Thanks for getting me through it.


Saturday, October 2, 2010

26.2 miles later...

And goodness gracious was it difficult.
I don't mean to make such a big deal out of this. I know lots of people run marathons and even if you haven't its easy to imagine how hard they would be. That's what you'd think right?
But you're wrong. Whatever you're imagining, its 1,000 times harder. Especially when you run your last seven miles in 96 degree weather.

Here's a quick recap and a few pictures. There are more and better pictures to come later. My dad got some good ones, as did Erin I think.
So going to bed last night at 8 was a bust. I ended up laying in bed until around 10:30, then just getting up and watching about 40 minutes of a movie to try and get tired. The reason I hit the sack so early was so we could make it to the 4 a.m. early bird bus where they give out prizes for people willing to take the earlier shuttles.

If there is one thing you should know about me it's that a lifelong dream of mine is to win a free ipod. I mean...everyone wins free ipods. Every time I even bring up this ambition of mine someone says "oh, I won my Ipod at blahblahblah" which is nothing but infuriating for us non-ipod winners. Last year I even went as far as to set up a separate e-mail account just for entering sweepstakes and entered four online ipod drawings a day for about two weeks before I forgot about it because Lost started back up again.
So, as luck would have it, the main giveaways they were doing on the early-bird bus was for...ipods! We got up. We got to the buses on time. We were feeling good. And then, I looked down...and realized I had forgotten my race number. And I had no cell phone. And no gas in my car. Or a wallet. Of course.

I ended up borrowing someone's cell phone and calling my mom like a whiney little girl. I also had to wait around for her to bring it meaning I missed the early bird bus and the prize of my dreams. The best part was the first thing she said when I called and told her my predicament:

"Goshdangit are always doing stuff like this!"
"uh mom...this is Katie."

She then sighed the sigh of a mother who has not ONE completely ridiculous and irresponsible daughter, but TWO. Sorry mom. Life is hard.

I want to save the details of the race for when I have some better pictures. Also I have been slowly dying on my couch all day and will probably drop dead if I try and think any harder about writing anything. Just know that I finished. And it was really hard. And I didn't win a free Ipod.
Foiled again by my own absurdity.

On the bright side, the experience was beautiful.
In its own I-wish-I-were-dead kind of way.

I am a marathon finisher.


What an experience to run with 7,500 motivated and committed people.

The best part.

Friday, October 1, 2010

Earliest I've gone to bed since...ever.

In almost exactly 11 hours from now I will be starting my first marathon.
Today consisted of sleeping in, quick mile and a half run, lunch with my long lost Erin, a tour of the marathon expo, driving the course (for mental preparation of course), family pictures, a large and delicious pasta dinner, and an 8:00 bedtime (meaning right now!).
Who knows if I will be able to sleep with all the nerves and excitement???
Scary thought: I have two blisters on my heel that should have been healed by now but aren't.
Exciting thought: It's almost over!
Boy oh boy.
It's gonna be crazy.
Wish me luck!
I knew I should have started being nicer. I'm really gonna need to good karma tomorrow.