Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Fire Drill

Sitting on my bed this afternoon doing homework I heard a knock at the door.

I answered it to find our new landlord, a cute twenty-something local girl (I'm assuming) who informed me that the BYU inspector would be here shortly to inspect (naturally) our apartment. (Although it would have been really funny if she said he was just coming over to hang out. I'll have to remember that one if I'm ever a landlord and decide to be really funny, which I would.)

Once she came inside, however, I did get a little uncomfortable.
"Sorry," I said, "We haven't cleaned for a few days.(weeks)"
"Oh that's fine," she said, "he's mostly just here to check fire alarms and stuff."
I then glanced nervously at our fridge, on top of which sat all three fire alarms for our apartment that we have simply disabled when they wouldn't stop beeping and just left there to collect dust.
(Who knew the beeping meant they needed new batteries?)

Question from the audience: "But Katie, what were you going to do if there was a fire in your apartment?"
Katie: "That happened the other day. I just blew it out."
Audience: "That was a candle."
Katie: "Blah. Blah. Blah. Tell me something I don't know."

So I was about to mention this fire alarm issue to the landlord when there was another knock at the door. The inspector was early because, as a BYU graduate, he has been taught that if you are on time you are late, and if you are early you are on time.
(He has also been taught that the straighter the part in his hair, the hotter his spiritual, future wife will be, but that one doesn't really apply in this situation.)
Inspector: "Why have all your fire alarms been temporarily disabled?"
Katie: "Who said this was temporary?"
Inspector: (didn't think my joke was funny) "You have two days to get them fixed."
I was under the impression that we had already fixed them by making them stop beeping, but as my Landlord so kindly informed me after the inspector left, this is not the case.
And so, tomorrow she is dropping us off some new batteries and we are in charge of re-attaching the alarms before the return of Mr. Punctual-Hair-Part.
Being responsible. Who needs it?


  1. haha love it. You are such a great/fun writer. love reading your posts! :)

  2. new landlord? what happened to lance? ha